Posted by: perchancetodream | March 18, 2009


I expected that once the stress of giving notice last Friday was over that I’d get some huge surge of energy.

That hasn’t happened.  In fact, just the opposite.

I thought I was getting sick last weekend.  But I never did really get a cold. I was just totally physically exhausted.  And it’s only gotten worse this week.

I’m trying not to have to find a doctor here until my new insurance kicks in May 4.I have too many things that I want taken care of to have to switch doctors in the middle.

A few years ago, I was diagnosed with degenerative disks in my neck.  Once I got the all-clear from the neurologist and the physical therapy/chiropractor cleared up the pain, I didn’t give it any though. And I’ve been fine for the past 2 years.  But now, I’m experiencing the back/neck/shoulder pain that began one morning after a camping trip (I’ve NO idea why one night in a sleeping back set this whole thing off but I could barely lift my arm the next day) about 4 years ago.

So I figure maybe it’s the pain that is wearing me out.

Or the strange thyroid results that Dr. Ambitious found really DID mean something (this is the first thing I intend to bring up with my new doctor once I have one).

I’m not even thinking about the diagnosis of Epstein Bar that I received back in the 80’s.  I’ve read stories about people who have it and who can’t get out of bed. Ever.  That isn’t the case with me although I think I could easily sleep away a few days at the moment.

Usually stress energizes me in a strange “I have to do something about this” kind of way.

And certainly there is enough that I SHOULD be doing right now to necessitate me staying awake to at least do something practical on a daily basis.

But it just isn’t happening.

I’d like to think that there isn’t some odd physical thing going on now anyhow.  I’ve had enough of doctors and meds in the past 2.5 years. But that means it’s mental/emotional.  Which means that, for once, I don’t really know what’s going on with me.  I’m not depressed.  In fact I have a lot to look forward to right now. I’m not completely overwhelmed although I’m aware that I’m behind in many of the things I want taken care of – I also know that come May, I’ll have more time to devote to those things.

So why do I want to do nothing but sleep?


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