Posted by: perchancetodream | December 4, 2008

Stolen Moments

13dpiui

I don’t have time to write this blog post but I’m going to anyhow.  Between work and my freelance work (which I love and which is keeping us afloat), I’m pretty much drowning at the moment.

That’s probably a good thing as it’s keeping my mind off the beta tomorrow.  Not that there is anything to worry or stress about.  I know what the outcome will be.

I’ve never really regretted my choices in life – however much there are things that everyone wishes they’d done differently.  And I don’t regret much now.  But I do wish that I was 10 years younger.  That we could follow PeeSticksandStones path into immunological testing. I’m now 100% convinced that we have no problems at all fertilizing eggs.  But they don’t stick around.  I don’t know if this is an age thing or if I’m just somehow killing them off. Ultimately, at this point, it really doesn’t matter.

I’m hoping to find some joy in this holiday season.  Anyone who knows me knows that I’m a bit of a holiday whore.  I’ll celebrate anything.  And I’m sure I’ll get caught up in it.  But it would have been nice to have a positive to take away the memories of last year’s pre-Xmas D&C.  Now at least I can drink so that’s something.

2009 will, I’m sure, be a strange year (not that this one hasn’t been).  We’ll hopefully have our last chance cycle in January.  And if that doesn’t work then I’ll go into heavy research on fostering and adoption – the timing of which will all be dependant on hubby’s job situation. I suppose it will be nice to feel like we’re doing something proactive. It just isn’t the proactive thing I was hoping for.

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Responses

  1. *hugs*

  2. I am sitting staring at this blank space wishing I could say the very right thing but not knowing what other than to say – I’m here.

    Xo

    Pam

  3. I’m really sorry.


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