Posted by: perchancetodream | February 16, 2008

I Must Have Been Bad in a Past Life….

11dpiui

So of course since I’ve written about how I had no pregnancy symptoms and that I was sure this cycle was a bust, I’ve had every symptom under the sun. Legitimately too…not the “only in my mind” type of symptoms.

So, you might ask…why aren’t I jumping for joy? Well…..you see, last time I got my lovely, bright almost neon like the lights of Times Square positive on 9dpiui. What have I gotten the last few days? A very, very faint bats-squeak of a positive. And while it doesn’t seem to be going away, it doesn’t seem to be getting darker either. WTF????

Am I looking at what will eventually be deemed a chemical pregnancy?

Sigh..in all honesty, what scares me more than this ending up as a pregnancy that never takes is my RE deciding, after failed back-to-back pregnancies that he won’t go through with any more IUIs and force us into financially-prohibitive IVF. SOMETHING is working with the IUIS even if we don’t actually have confirmation of a child yet.

Perhaps this will work out after all anyhow. Beta is meant to be Tuesday. I hope that I go into the appointment with a feeling one way or the other.

Edit from my annoyingly accurate favorite astrologer:

Your Week Ahead: So near, yet so far. So, almost but not quite. So tantalisingly, frustratingly, just on the very edge of being attainable. Oh, come on. Don’t pretend you don’t know what I’m talking about. You are being coy because you do not care to confess the true depth of your desire. If you can pretend that you are not really bothered, you can at least preserve your pride. Why do that? Just put all your energy into stretching that little bit further. This week’s eclipse insists, that you can yet manage to make that elusive but essential connection. Be brave. Keep trying.

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Responses

  1. WOW. Speechless, HUGS, I know it is scary, For the longest time my greatest fear was that IT would happen again. Beta will reveal more. Sorry you have to wait until Tuesday. I am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

  2. Okay, I totally have to chime in here with my experience of the pee sticks. They were both negative. The first one I took on day…12, of course, ended up getting a positive beta later that night. The second one I took 2 weeks later and it was *still* negative…

    …so I’m holding out for the beta. 9dpiui is early. And your peestick might be crap. So, beta.

    And crossed fingers.


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